As I write I’m repeating a Sunday School class on the book “Soul Care,” written by Rob Reimer, a professor of pastoral theology at Alliance Theological Seminary and founder of Renewal Ministries International. The class is being taught by the respective pastors of men’s and women’s ministries at my church.
I bring this up because, as part of the discussion, both have been frank about their struggles with families, their dysfunctions, their own woundedness, especially in childhood. That they had such issues no longer surprises me, although had I heard it decades ago it certainly would have.
I’m not going to go through the contents of the book; that would take way too long. But suffice it to say that I believe that part of the reason that the American evangelical church is ineffective in “reaching the lost” is due to its lack of authenticity — that is to say, its members often aren’t altogether honest, whether with themselves or others, about who they are and what they have to deal with.
Part of that, I would suspect, has do with the emphasis, most notably in the 1980s and ‘90s thanks to media “ministries,” about maintaining an image of a strong family, especially one with a strong father figure. The trouble, of course, was that the image never dealt with the reality of everyone in a family being weak in his or her own way.
To give examples, supposedly a majority of Christian men, even pastors, have problems with pornography. In “complementarian” households — in practice, where men have much more of the power — men are most likely to abuse their wives and children. The divorce rate among evangelicals is even higher than the rest of the world. It’s long accepted that sex outside of covenant marriage is rampant among evangelicals, with not even such pro-chastity programs as “True Love Waits” and the “Silver Ring Thing” having much effect among teens.
I suspect that we’re focusing more on the symptoms because we don’t want to appear weak in a culture that doesn’t agree with what we consider our values. But maybe maintaining “values” is the heart of the problem — in a way, doing so represents a subtle form of idolatry because, if you have “values,” what do you really need Jesus for? (This is why trying to refocus upon getting such values back in the public square can never work.)
One of my favorite books is Philip Yancey’s “What’s So Amazing About Grace?”, and in it he suggested that effective church fellowship should be run like an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting — everyone needs what he called “grace on tap.” And when you look at things in that way, you often get rid of the judgmentalism that’s rampant in many church settings.
The pastor of men’s ministry at my church has mentioned that the purpose of the Soul Care class was to deepen “intimacy with God,” and that should lead to a better understanding of His grace. And then that grace can transform lives in a way that edicts and programs simply can’t.
I bring this up because, as part of the discussion, both have been frank about their struggles with families, their dysfunctions, their own woundedness, especially in childhood. That they had such issues no longer surprises me, although had I heard it decades ago it certainly would have.
I’m not going to go through the contents of the book; that would take way too long. But suffice it to say that I believe that part of the reason that the American evangelical church is ineffective in “reaching the lost” is due to its lack of authenticity — that is to say, its members often aren’t altogether honest, whether with themselves or others, about who they are and what they have to deal with.
Part of that, I would suspect, has do with the emphasis, most notably in the 1980s and ‘90s thanks to media “ministries,” about maintaining an image of a strong family, especially one with a strong father figure. The trouble, of course, was that the image never dealt with the reality of everyone in a family being weak in his or her own way.
To give examples, supposedly a majority of Christian men, even pastors, have problems with pornography. In “complementarian” households — in practice, where men have much more of the power — men are most likely to abuse their wives and children. The divorce rate among evangelicals is even higher than the rest of the world. It’s long accepted that sex outside of covenant marriage is rampant among evangelicals, with not even such pro-chastity programs as “True Love Waits” and the “Silver Ring Thing” having much effect among teens.
I suspect that we’re focusing more on the symptoms because we don’t want to appear weak in a culture that doesn’t agree with what we consider our values. But maybe maintaining “values” is the heart of the problem — in a way, doing so represents a subtle form of idolatry because, if you have “values,” what do you really need Jesus for? (This is why trying to refocus upon getting such values back in the public square can never work.)
One of my favorite books is Philip Yancey’s “What’s So Amazing About Grace?”, and in it he suggested that effective church fellowship should be run like an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting — everyone needs what he called “grace on tap.” And when you look at things in that way, you often get rid of the judgmentalism that’s rampant in many church settings.
The pastor of men’s ministry at my church has mentioned that the purpose of the Soul Care class was to deepen “intimacy with God,” and that should lead to a better understanding of His grace. And then that grace can transform lives in a way that edicts and programs simply can’t.